Trump’ologues: The Silver Lining

Mark these down for the records books…

  • I followed 5 politicians on Facebook today
  • I watched 45 minutes of political news commentary yesterday
  • I’m staying current on who is being elected in positions of prominence

NEVER EVER in 49 years have I ever considered doing any of these things. It has been a conscious choice to place my energies towards those things I felt I could impact.

Donald Trump changed this!!

I did not think there was a chance in hell Trump would become president.  After listening to him speak about women in such a derogatory way, I thought he was done.  No one would vote for someone who had spoken about women in such a way, right?? Wrong…Dead Wrong.  There are enough angry people that his volatile words and actions were not enough to deter them from showing up and sending him to the White House.

Since then, I’ve scanned Facebook feeds and the headlines and see clearly the expressions of fear and anger – the taking of stances and drawing of lines all in an effort to get someone different to GET IT.  I’ve witnessed verbal wars, name calling, prejudice, misogyny, bigotry and hate – over reaction coming from all sides.  Often from decent people.  People I like.  People I still like. They are reacting to deep emotional and visceral things only they can understand.

I asked Eric this morning, “why do all these people feel the need to spend so much time trying to get others to see their point instead of getting up and actually doing something that will evoke change?”

To paraphrase Brene’ Brown, “if you are not in the arena with blood, tears and mud on your face, then I don’t want to hear from you.”  Here’s a shocking truth… most people do not care what you think.  They mostly care about what they think.

Letting a few days pass without engaging in any external dialogue has always served me well.  After a few days clarity formed around what potential exists within the chaos of this moment.

Amazing things are going to happen….

Think about this… One million women are gathering in Washington D.C. to take a stand for what they want to communicate.  They are going to shout at the top of their lungs about their rights.  A comfortable win would not have ignited the spark that is driving people from their homes to head to the capital.


A fire that has been burning for a long time has just had propane thrown on it and people who might normally have just gone to work on January 21 are going to take to the streets and scream “we will not go backwards”.  Shit, I might join them.  If I go, it won’t be to belittle Donald Trump, but to take a stand for something I’ve talked about for years, but haven’t done a lot about; my rights as a woman.

Is it wrong to feel excited about this? Looking beneath the surface of this protest there is something amazing – Strong beautiful people stepping out in a way they might never have before – finding courage; finding their voice; finding a community. Let’s pray there is no violence.

Donald Trump was a catalyst for this…  In some weird way, he will do more for women than we can imagine right now.

Yes, our president can take actions that will not fit within certain agendas.  This will make people angry… very angry.  If anger is channeled correctly it can serve a higher purpose and create action from complacency.  My biggest moments, the times when I was bold, took chances and made the biggest changes in my life…these things happened because I was furious.  I left a marriage, I left jobs and I spoke louder than I ever had.  Hell, I even decided to do a television show because someone had finally pushed my buttons hard enough, it was more painful to not do something.  In reflection, I acknowledge more often than not, the biggest person to keep me back was me, not someone else.

I think we are going to be OK.  I don’t believe the World ended last Wednesday.

Social challenges will stay at the forefront of conversations, they will continue to be there.   We have been given the gift of chaos and it is up to us to channel it effectively. The most amount of change happens when things get painful. The more painful it is, the bigger the catalyst for change.  Our greatest efforts do not happen when we are comfortable, they happen when we feel like we have been sucker punched in the gut and had our face shoved in the mud.

If you are reeling, shocked, dismayed, afraid and angry, then do something that makes a difference. But, if you are going to do something, DO IT NOW, because complacency is right around the corner.

Here are my predictions….

  • There are those who have been moving their passion along with softer voices who will begin to speak louder; they will be willing to take a bigger stand
  • Critical social issues will stay at the forefront and new leaders will emerge with clearer intentions pulling us in the right direction
  • Women’s voices will rise and be heard by ears more willing to listen, because men are shocked too and they have cried
  • Incredible and courageous heroes will emerge within groups that need more heroes
  • Some will see the vitriol spewing and they will dedicate themselves to never being that way evoking change in their own circles
  • Someone who might have stood by and witnessed unkindness, will step up and take a stand for someone else
  • Seeds are being planted in young people now that will grow into future movements for change

I feel these souls there and sense their courage building. Now, we await for them to step into the light so we can all feel their presence and rejoice in their strength.

Stay calm my loves….the next few years will not be easy…not for any of us and you can rest assured they will not be easy for Donald Trump.

  1. Debra – you completely nailed everything that I have been thinking about since the election. I moved from the Bay Area to San Diego in 2001 and naively thought Southern California had the same political insights as Northern California. I was at a party and mentioned how much I admired Hillary Clinton and was viciously attacked and berated by two woman who I thought would have had the same views as myself. From that point on, I retreated and rarely expressed my opinion in public. Your blog post has helped me realize that I have a valuable point of view and will from this day on will be emboldened to express it. Thank you!

    • Thank you so much for sharing that Judy. Your view is valuable and I’m glad you feel empowered to share it. xoxo

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